I admit it

I'm mad at P. right now!

He asked Slate to stay in SF instead of going down to Cinegear so that he can get some scenes down. NNNNNOOOO!!!! That is so not cool. Slate told me himself that P.'s making him stay and that Scooter and I would have to find another ride. That can't happen.

The reason I want Slate to be there is two-fold: One, he totally deserves a break from shooting. He and his friend (M.E.) have been working so hard on this production. He was telling me that Cinegear was supposed to be his "summer break". Now he's stuck in SF working on P.'s stupid movie (which I think isn't that great anyway) while everyone's going to the event that he's been looking forward to all year? Two, I want him there because...

I like him. There. I admit it. I like him, I do. And I want him there for my birthday. He's smart, funny, warm, and I'm totally intimidated by him like most of the guys I like. I chose "scared" in the last post. I called Cher for her advice about Slate, and she said that maybe "scared" of him isn't the right expression. I'm intimidated by him. That's all I want for my birthday, for him to be there. God, I'm such a girl.

Moreover, P. is just pissing me off. He keeps repeatedly asking about my movie idea. At first it was very flattering, and now it's just really annoying. I swear, he keeps asking about it at every shoot. I have this feeling he has a crush on me: he wants to hang out with me (just me) outside the shoot, I made him a cd and he called it "the best gift he's ever received", and he texts messages me all the time.

I like him as a friend. He's nice and all, but I really don't like him that way, and after this whole production of his film, he's starting to get on my nerves. The best thing though is that he knows already that I don't want a boyfriend--he asked me what my "situation" was, and I told him bluntly that I'm not dating and that I don't need a boyfriend right now. It's better to get those things out instead of being vague because that wastes time.

Scooter and I were going to go to a movie together, and P. wants to come too even though he's seen the film already. Ugh! I really don't like P.