Action!

I have officially directed my first film. Music video, rather. It was quite the experience. I've never been the type to take charge or lead a group--I'm usually the follower, but this was probably the first time that I've had to take charge before and be (or appear to be) ahead of the game. My head was constantly swimming with shots that needed to be done, locations where we had to shoot, ideas for editing. I was breathing this film project, and I let it consume me, stress me out, and take over my life.

It was wonderful.

Of course, it was very stressful since I had a bunch of school work to do. But I somehow managed it. I got it done, and it turned out better than I had hoped. In the beginning I felt that what I would turn in would be second-rate, something like a rough cut, but no, I was glad with the results, and L. was a huge help to me. She was my second set of eyes, telling me that this take worked better than that one or that my editing was confusing. I could not have done it without her.

My actors or "talent" as they say were very, very good. They were just random people I knew myself or through friends. They were very professional and gave me ideas. I think they cut me some slack as a director since I sometimes didn't know what I was doing or I didn't give them enough direction. I asked one of them how I was doing as a director and she said that I was doing good. L. said that I was a good combination of being the person in charge and being an overall nice person.

I think I was okay. I just need to be more organized when it comes to planning shots. Sometimes, I'd forget to do certain shots all together. We fixed things in editing and we had enough coverage (enough shots for editing).

It was amazing to finally do something with what I have. I mean, I finally got the experience to make something. The old me would have just given up the idea, think of it as a pipe dream. I got chills whenever I said, "Action!". And it felt right too. I know I can do this. I don't care what anybody says. This is what I have to do with my life. With any other option, I would not be living to my full potential.

Today, Scarf came over to our apartment. Coincidentally, K., my roommate, knows him from a class they have together. I opened the door to my apartment, and there he was sitting at our table. We made eye contact. Too shocked and shy to say anything, I turned and went straight to my room. I didn't even say hi! I'm such a goof. He and another girl came over to study with K.

I went to leave for class, and they were still in the living room. I said, "Bye, K. And K.'s friends. And...Scarf." I didn't say Scarf, of course, but you get it. He said bye.

Later, K. came up to me and said that Scarf said, "I think I know your roommate." K. knows that I think he's cute. K. said to him, "Yeah, she's in the Collective. She turned in a film for the festival." She told him what the film is about. He's all, "Yeah...I think it got in." YAYAYAYA!!!!

I invited a bunch of people I know to the festival. I'm usually pretty humble, but I really want people to see it. My roommates are coming, my brother's friend and her boyfriend, the actors that were in it, and their friends. I really hope they do show it.